Are you going to be happy or regretful about the way you lived your life?

By Eldad Ben-Moshe ✨ Reading Time: 3 minutes

I came across a post where a parent was asking other parents,
whose kids have already grown,
what do they miss most.

Hundreds of responses
(this will be important even if you don't have kids).

About 95% of the people wrote about...
Spending time with them.

Any form of time together -
hugs, playing, driving them to soccer practices & matches, vacations, camping, etc.
Some specifically stated even the noise, nagging, fights (with siblings)...

Some wrote they were too busy working that they missed the whole thing,
and they are full of regrets about that.

Some wrote that no matter how much money you spend on them,
what they ended up remembering and cherishing are the moments together, the shared experiences, big and small.

It reminds me of my firm belief that our best moments in life are the ones in which we give and/or receive love.

Whether that's true or not, 
and whether you're a parent or not,
the questions remain:

What are the most important things in your life?

And are you living your life accordingly?
Spending your time accordingly?

Are you going to be happy about the way you lived your life, 
or are your choices in the present such that you will regret them?

Now look,

I know life can be hard.

I know money is important. 
I know there is fun and fulfillment in achievements. 

Notice I'm not saying what to do in the level of form.
I'm not saying don't work or work less.

I am, though, shaking your boat on the level of essence:

1. What are the most important things in your life?

2. Are you living your life accordingly? Spending your time accordingly?

3. Are you going to be happy about the way you lived your life, 
or are your choices in the present such that you will regret them?

There are ways to have a sustainable, healthy success.

It's not either-or (either money and success or time for what's important to you.)

You can have both.

The keys are:

1. Be super honest about your priorities.
Not what sounds nice, not what you wish they were, and not unrealistic la-la-land BS.
Be real.

2. Make sure your choices and actions are taking you towards your priorities, not away from them.

3. Choose from Love, not from fear.
That doesn't mean being irresponsible and out of touch with reality. 

4. Make sure every day you're staying on track and not giving in to fear, comfort, and other sabotagers.
Make sure every day that you're marching towards your priorities, not away from them.

5. Keep doing what's working, and immediately change what isn't - otherwise it'll become the new norm.
And before you notice it, it'll become your habit, your unconscious pattern. 

That is still possible to change, but it's much harder and will take a longer time (very well worth the effort, though. But much better to deal with things before they evolve into a pattern).

6. The best way to do #4 + #5 is not through motivation, but by building healthy habits that "stick", healthy life-systems that actually work (step #8 in the High-Achievers Crisis Transformation System™).